He Loves You

So I asked God to give me something to share in regards to Valentines Day. Something about love, His love. And all that kept coming to mind was a time when I was DESPERATELY lonely - oddly enough. But then when I thought about putting my story into words I realized how much it reflects HIS love, not what we seek here on earth. Now I will preface this by saying - yes, another Valentines day has passed and I am still single, but I have come a long way in my walk with Jesus and am fully content resting in His love and knowing He has a great plan and purpose for my life. And if it involves a husband for me, He will bring that wonderful man into my life when the time is right.

So with that being said, my loneliness story takes place about 5ish or 6 years ago. And there was alot of issue's going on with my family. With my youngest sister in particular. She was young, feeling lost, lonely, hurt and was trying to take her own life by slitting her wrists. [let me also say that I am the only one in my family that chooses a life of walking with Jesus] We went through many episodes of arguing, hugs, laughs, stress, hiding sharp objects from her, taking the locks off her door, etc. Mainly alot of emotional stress. And in times like that I tend to "escape" reality as much as possible... I actually enjoyed going to work, or being able to get out of the house as much as possible. And also slept alot... I was emotionally drained. But work was stressful too. We were short staffed, and I was a CSR at the time, taking over 100 calls a day. That's alot of people to talk to in one day. It was crazy being relied on my by family to "hold us together" emotionally. I finally hit my breaking point. Something had to give and I couldn't take it any longer.

One day, while leaving work, I barely made it out of the building to go home before I busted into tears. I went home, went to my room and just cried and prayed and cried. I was a mess. Eventually when I calmed myself down enough, I laid on my back staring at the ceiling and cried out one last desperate prayer. I said, "Jesus, I know that you will never leave me or forsake me. And I know that you are here with me right now. But I need to know that somebody on this earth loves me." After that I remember being so tired that I fluttered in and out of consciousness... I think about 5 minutes went by and then my cell phone rang. It ended up being a really great friend calling to see if I was ok. I of course burst into tears again because I could "feel" her love through the phone. I remember her asking me what was wrong and I said she wouldn't understand. She then encouraged me to share and then prayed with me, for me and then several times told me she loved me. I of course burst into tears again and said "Thank you Jesus" for having her call me.

So in light of this past Valentines Day, I think He wants me to remind you that He loves you. He cares about every little detail of your life and if you asked Him into your heart to save you and be your Savior, he is with you right now. Whatever you need, ask and it shall be given to you. One of my all time favorite verses, that I lean on every now and then is Hebrews 13:5 - the Amplified version: "For He [God] Himself has said, I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support. I will not, I will not, I will not in any degree leave you helpless nor forsake nor let [you] down (relax My hold on you)! [Assuredly not!] I added the bold and italicized... I especially like the "relax My hold on you". He has me in His arms at all times. He has youin His arms at all times.

He loves you!